News Barron

Just unreal, this is literally just a couple people putting music over clips of playing with toys out in the desert.

Lauren Witzke and Edward Szall, two thoroughly exposed grifters from the 2018-2021 era of the online right, have started a completely fake project called Noah’s Ark Scans after finding a mountain vaguely in the shape of a boat out in Turkey. They are now yanking everyone’s chain by acting like they’re excavating shit out there and doing all these studies to carbon date the rocks and prove they were somehow part of Noah’s boat from biblical times. You just know they’re making generational wealth off this shit. Lauren apparently claims to have raised 20 mil in the last 4 years, and now she's asking for another 600k to play in the sand. Yeah I’m sure it’s God’s divine plan for Noah’s ark to ultimately be uncovered by some methed out bitch who used to run drugs for the literal cartel. If you think this even looks like a boat I got a beach house nearby it to sell you.